Home that’s where the heart is!

It was a hot summer day.  My son just came home from school.  After finishing his home assignments, it was time for him to take a short nap.  It is a great privilege for me to assists him in whatever I could.  I’d sing him a lullaby, which would coolly put him to sleep peacefully.  I would watch him sleeping from near, very dearly.  Somehow I was reminded of my childhood days.

Since my Kindergarten days, I had the privilege of living away from home in our relatives places.  I’d stayed in their places, which are miles away from home.  This practice helped us in many ways, mostly on financial grounds, as we could not afford good schooling.  This staying away from home gave me immense joy and experience in my life.

It was during the night, I mostly craved for home.  The touch of my parents and grandparents along with my siblings was deeply missed.  Many times, I remember lying in a pool of my own tears.  This was NOT because my relatives were harsh to me.  It was just that I missed home.  The smell of home just passed through my senses.  I was just a lonesome child far away from home.  I can recall my cousins ‘sympathizing’ me as best as they could.

Summer holidays are welcomed with great excitement.  For a short stay at home we would walk miles with gaiety.  Once I told my parents, I’d already shed enough tears for the love of them that I wouldn’t shed no more tears in their departure.  However, I realized that it was far from the truth.  When Daddy was diagnosed with cancer, I regretted going to the city for pursuing higher studies.  I told him straightaway I spent too little time with them.

Home that’s where the heart is! The corporal punishments and scolding for better behavior was still sweet from parents, not from anyone other than them.  In a matter of time, we all become grownups, which make it necessary to start making our own living and fight for our survival.  At that point of life, it was impossible to stay together if the pasture was thinning away with time.  Even now we lived faraway from home.  We need to find our own way of sustaining life.

For someone, I know, it might feel not worth telling or uncalled for.  I find it to be indispensable.   We need to remind ourselves what we’ve been through.   It is simple but close to my heart.   Your comments and experience, if available, would be appreciated.   Let me reiterate here again that;

Home that’s where the heart is!

Destination Home

It was one among those many days, where I needed to rush home soon, before the end of normal working hours.  Sometimes, I needed rest or medication even in the middle of the day.  On a normal days, I always waited for working hours to end.  I’d do double checking of the work performed in the day to make sure there were no hanging transactions.  I’d even help my colleagues in doing that.

But many times, I had to rush out from the air-conditioned room, as my neurological disorder threatens to strike anytime.  As always, I need space and fresh air.  It was difficult to be in a close room.   But then I need to get home by any means. I’d entered underground subway station, which was rather crowded and lack fresh air.  I waited for a few minutes after which I boarded the train with destination to my residence.

Three or four stations passed by before I need to get out as I sense something is wrong in my body.  The positive side was that I am blessed with auras, which give me time to react or take medicines. On a normal days, I need not get down before I reached my destination.

I’d sat there on the ground leaning my back on the erstwhile pillar inside the underground subway station.  I’d called home informing my situation and the name of the subway station I’m in.  I’d request them to call in my cell phone after every five or ten minutes, to check on me or to help keep me awake.

To get home, I knew, I had to get back on train but I can’t until my condition gets better.  At last, I took my stance and decided to get back on the next trains.  Without doing that I could never get home.  The insecurities I had at these times were indescribable.   Many times I don’t know whether I would even get home, ever.  Will I be brought to hospital first or at home, was the big question looming large in my mind.

Now I want you to consider something here:  Jesus bore my iniquities to the cross before I was even born.  That was more than enough to get me home with Him in eternity.  To have that privilege, I need to do just one thing on my part, to confess my iniquities and give my life to Him.  That is the beginning of my journey towards eternal life.  However, if I didn’t take that particular step, the eternal life promised becomes and will always be a distant dream.  We were more valuable to Him than we value ourselves.  We are made to His children lest we deny it.

As you can see, I need to do something on my part to get home despite my illness threatening.  In the same way, I need to make my decision or take necessary step to have that promise of eternal life even after death.  Missed your chance? No problem, this is another chance because I am reminding you now.  Let Him have your life, it will be renewed.  I also let few trains had passed but I need to get up despite my problem.

For the message of the cross is foolishness to those who are perishing, but to us who are being saved it is the power of God.*

Back to my journey home, it doesn’t matter whether I ended up being in a hospital first before I get home.  I am blessed to get home to be with my family.  These are the adversities that drew me closer to God.  It may be mentioned here that many times  ‘the WHY ME, GOD? WHY? moments’ struck me.   But He carried me through on His shoulder to let me see the beauty of another day.  And I am more than thankful for that.

All my sufferings are nothing in comparison with the sufferings Jesus Christ bear for us in his final days.  The humiliation, the curse, the physical torture, the loneliness, the pain…., all suffered for me to live.  He will lead me home, one day.

 *1 Corinthians 1:18

Papa come Home soon

My wife and my son visited me in my hospital bed.  After curiously observing me for a while….

“Papa, I want to sleep in your arms please?” requested my son with great longing that can be seen in his eyes.

We took permissions from the staff concern.  And in a moment, my son was asleep in my arms.

“Papa I miss you so much, please come home now. Didn’t you miss me too?” he whispered in my ears.

“Miss you much more than you do, son.” I replied.

It broke my heart seeing him this way.  We missed each other a lot.   Sleepless nights are common in my hospital bed.  I’d been away from home for the last 20 days.  Unfortunately, I’d been hospitalised three times in  a span of 5 months for atleast 3 weeks stay in a row.

The visiting time was soon over.

“Papa, please come home soon,” said my child.

“Yes I will. Keep praying for my good health,” I said.

He really keeps praying for me.  At times, he would lay his small tiny hands on me and pray wholeheartedly for me.

The situation has been hard to bear.  But we need to follow the ordeal of life.  Unexpected turns are common in life.

The day I left my job to be with my son, I never thought such things are bound to happen.  But now, with nothing in hand I lay alone here in my hospital bed.

September 2015